We have all asked inappropriate questions. More importantly, we have all been asked such questions. Usually, we only come up with a really smart reply hours later, when we have had time to digest it and work through the surprise or anger. When you are the bride or groom, it is imperative that you do not let such a question upset you or rock your otherwise-dreamy day. Rather be prepared and composed. The following are some of the more commonly-asked questions that leave one uncomfortable as well as an appropriate suggested answer:
Q: Do you really think your marriage will last?
A: Wow, guess who had an extra dose of “Mr Pessimistic” today!
Remember: This question is typical of someone who has been hurt in their own marriage or is jealous of your happiness. They likely want to sow seeds of doubt because it hurts to see you so happy. It is best (albeit very difficult) to reply using humour.
Q: Why do you have to have such a long engagement?
A: Because it takes a long time to get the best wedding venue / dress / caterers etc…
Because I want to finish my degree before I get married
Remember: This person may not be asking to be rude, but simply be unaware of how long it takes to plan the dream wedding. Try to be patient and honest in your reply.
Q: Why did you rush your engagement so?
A: We have been together a long time and started planning the wedding ages ago.
Remember: Being overly gushy about your excitement and not being able to wait may reinforce their feelings that you are getting married prematurely.
Q: Do you really think you are ready for marriage?
A: (Confidently and with a huge smile) Definitely! We can’t wait to spend our lives together!
Remember: This is usually asked by someone who has either had no experience or a negative one. They are simply making their problems yours.
Q: Who on earth chose that ring?
A: He / I / we did and I’m absolutely in love with it (then change the subject)
Remember: It is far too easy to be mean about the engagement ring to express one’s envy. Do not entertain the thought, but move along. They do not have to wear the ring and have no need to worry about it.
Q: Who is paying for this glamorous reception?
A: That’s between my fiancé / new husband and I, Miss Nosey!
Remember: It is never appropriate to ask someone what anything cost, so this person is taking advantage of your jovial mood. By using a little humour in your reply, you make it easier to diffuse the situation without hurt feelings.
Q: I love your wedding dress / venue / some other idea; I think I’ll use it too
A: Well, I’m sure it would look great on you / at your wedding, but you’ll definitely need to personalise it for yourself (perhaps provide an idea or offer to come up with something together).
Q: Am I invited to your wedding?
A: (If the answer not “yes”) Well, we have a tight budget and can only really accommodate our closest friends and family, sorry.
Q: You don’t mind if I bring someone along as my date, do you?
A: We are so glad you can come. Sorry that we didn’t make it clearer, but we already have a packed venue, so dates can’t be included for each guest.
Remember: Some people just feel that weddings are a free-for-all. Do not feel compelled to go out of your way to make space for this one, though, as it will only leave you stressed and, possibly, resentful.
Q: When are you having children?
A: Well, we look forward to starting a family, but want to enjoy each other as a couple first.
Remember: Some people, especially the older ones, get caught up in the excitement of starting your family simply because you are now married. Take this as a sign of their love and enthusiasm.
Photo Credit: www.glamour.com